catkins, contrails

when death says, my darling life, sweet lily of my desert.

tightlacing the words onto my waist and as they morph into sharp swages may they pierce through my skin and become tendrils coiling my ribs. 

hiking

101223

went hiking @ taman tugu yesterday after a long time, completed 30 full checkpoints around 5-6 km. last i hiked was in 2020 @ bukit simen... each time i felt exhaustion i am reminded of my roommate's mother who hikes all time since her daughters are currently studying at universities far from home (she's reaching fifty). also there are so many people who hiked that morning, and even toddlers at least two or three-year-old. 

at one point felt blood rush to my head along with palpitation and i started not hearing my friends' voice. later when we're back, amirah told me that it is often a symptom that precede syncope.

anyway, a mmc grade 2 survivor at last... though my calf hurts like hell today. 

recap: there's so many missing people cases these days and train tragedies, namely the recent lrt suicide, mrt putrajaya flashers, and an appearance of a strange man eating raw asparagus + causing other nuisance. my friends are currently having their end-of-posting examinations these two weeks. completed a masterpiece called murderous lewellyn's candlelight dinner. final rate 10/10. 0:)

that's all for now. 

lone whale

maybe i am one half of you, 52 blue

what it feels like

a cave without stalactites. and the stalagmites pierce through my spine.

loved you too much, it ruins me into fractions of a lost cause, a despairer, a sinister.

.

my mind feels muddled.

how can i extend a help for an ethnicity that is being wiped out so brutally? they're dying every second and the word healthcare collapse truly sounds like a death penalty. i can't even imagine the pain caused by the white phosphorus on their skin and yet. how could people be so ruthless to the point of their infants are being taught to mock the suffering of other humans... in the name of a fad?

they must shoulder the guilt and the consequences. it is too big of a crime to ever be forgiven. may the peaceful nights return to the wounded and the wronged, very soon. 

*

in my made up dream you are smiling peacefully in a coffin and a troop of kodama are there as your pallbearers

digital art for beginners, a personal note

hi hi hi, to no one. 

it's currently september 2023 which marks my sixth month on procreate. 

going to jot down notes on some useful reference i've made during my transition phase from traditional to digital art for my own reference in the future & for whoever who might need it,,, 

*disclaimer* most are free resources hence they might be limited, but this is a cheapskate thread anyway :) 

1. currently my device is ipad pro 11 and i draw on procreate (bought on shopee for rm1). beforehand, i was on ibispaintx, but it was a very short journey hence i would like to share more about procreate explorations. 

first of all, take some time to watch tutorials on the basic (how to use the program's tools) so you don't get lost exploring. i recommend this comprehensive procreate tutorial by luma_llama on youtube (10 min) 

you don't have to follow every artist on the Internet. there are many hacks / additional features you can learn over time through tik tok or other yt channels, for example how to create a colour palette from an image. soon enough, your algorithm will bring up various artists and you can always choose the ones whose tutorials fit you most. 

take time exploring, because it'll be more fun that way! 

2. brushes 

brushes for procreate

there's a lot of free brushes here, only download what you need— like if you're drawing fire, only download fire pack, or if you're drawing tree, download tree / nature related pack to save on storage. purchasing brushes pack on shopee actually profits not the actual artist / brushmaker, it's better spent as patron on gumroad if you want to support. 

jingsketch basic brush (free)

i love the flat square brush a LOT. other brushes are nice, as well, but the flat square is perfect for both sketch & colouring. 

theariyaki procreate pack (free)

grainy thea sketch is my personal fav. it is a sketch brush but if you're not a fan of art line, this brush actually makes your drawing look smoother after colouring. in the same pack, i usually switch between grainy block to colour and lasso tool if the area is big. there are three texture brushes in this pack which are all decent in giving details to drawing.

3. references

figure drawing

this is perfect for speed sketching practice. you can set the time on your own and choose what image you want to practice. a croquis feast. the only downside is that its free ver is a bit hard to control. 

headlight

this is a face lighting study by william nguyen. haven't tried this one on my art but it's definitely helpful to shade a character's face. 

body poses

bodies in motion

provides reference for body poses, 3d scan with lighting shift, expressions. this site is very convenient for body pose study. although, to experience more features especially on 3d scan, you must register an account. 

posemaniacs

anatomy study would be good for this since the 3d bodies are literally anatomical lab bodies (all the muscles and whatnot). i can say this is very convenient to use, you can change angle and size, very helpful for human perspective drawing. they also have hands and both female and male body references. 

3d models / assets

most 3d programs are paid, and that's understandable because building 3d models takes a lot of time and energy. as an alternative for people who are not willing to learn blender / sketchup to design their own models, you can always use free 3d models from websites. 

one of the most common problems arising with 3d models is art style consistency. this is where tracing comes handy. you can use the 3d model as perspective reference and snap the specific angle you want or trace over it to make shape of what you want to create, then fit it to your artstyle (using your brush your always use / colour schemes you're comfortable). this is also a solution for paid ones & to save on storage, but the cons is that you cannot adjust to other angle afterward (as it has been documented to 2d).

some websites i would recommend for these purposes:

free3d

free options are very limited, and simulation is not accessible. however the range is quite big if you include the paid ones! 

sketchfab

endless options & accessible simulation. you can try moving the model before you purchase (to enable download). however after downloading, some models can't be used due to uv overlapping / missing uv, and it needs to be unwrapped in another software but i have yet to learn it. 

backgrounds

i rarely draw backgrounds, and once i did draw one from scratch. it took too much time and energy. honestly, this sounds template but from the reading i have done, many artists either take photos themselves / use games like sim4 to avoid copyright if they blindly pick licensed photos from google. for reference, though, here is one of the great free sites people have recommended: pexel

these are all the findings that i have tried myself and think are fit for a beginner! will update my learning progress + nice art hacks i find from time to time ^^

saturday

final examination is near.

i was studying in the living room with balqis when she mentioned prof mun, a pathology lecturer in our course. apparently prof mun said that cancer cures very possibly, had been found for a while. there are like endless researches of it, so what's stopping the cure to be distributed to the public? then came the discussion: if the cure is immediately released to the market, those chemotherapy and support drugs that are readily in the market surely will decline in sale, and causes big loss to the pharmaceutical industry.

unless there is a start up company taking the risk to launch their drug (which they surely need to thrive as the cancer drug being their main production)... or one of the big companies see the light of altruism, then we might see no end to this.